Seeking “The Spark”

 

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Full moon & sunset over Maiori, Italy. One of my favorite views yet.

 

We’re all searching for a spark. Something that reassures us we’re exactly where we’re supposed to be. A feeling that creates butterflies in our stomachs so undeniable we can’t help but smile when they flutter. An excitement that drives us to get out of bed in the morning, to keep pushing forward with each new day.

These sparks are so wonderful because they’re rare. They’re specific to you and your desires. Only you can feel them deeply.

Where do we find these sparks exactly? That’s the best part, you never know when they’ll pop up. You could find them in a book you’re reading that awakens something inside of you. Maybe it’s song lyrics that give you goosebumps or a hobby turned into a passion over time. A conversation with a stranger at a coffee shop that makes you think twice about where you’re headed in life. City ambition, the simplicity of the country, a look down memory lane with your family members. Dancing, photography, helping people, or even hitting the gym. It’s a feeling you’ll crave more of.

When you discover that feeling, let it wash over you. Feeling a spark is incomparable to any other emotion. It will send tingles down your spine while grounding you in the same moment. It’s magic and reassurance combined.

Of course, relationships are probably what come to mind when you think of “flying sparks.” It’s true, you can’t have a successful relationship without sparks. Everyone wants to kiss their partner and feel those butterflies. The spark that makes you feel like you can float away but also comfortably curl up into. Again, it’s magical, and isn’t that something we all deserve?

I’ve found sparks in writing time and time again. When I put pen to paper and create stories, I get those butterflies. When I find a way to tie my thoughts together, I feel giddy. And that’s just it; you may not understand how I could feel this way about something others may consider tedious but that’s how I know this is one of my sparks. And I indulge in it as I please.

You are worthy of endless sparks in your life – we all are. We all deserve to wake up as though it’s on purpose and greet each day as an opportunity to live fully. We deserve to find sparks, some greater than others, but also recognize why certain ones have faded as we’ve grown. Sometimes a spark is only meant to burn for a short while.

Seeking sparks more often than not turns into them finding you. Sparks come around when you pursue your passions and surround yourself with people who make you feel special. Sparks fly in relationships when you’re able to be your true self and love your partner as they are, too.

A spark can only shine brightly when you claim it as your own, so own it proudly.

Sparks are the reason you should never settle in any aspect of your life. At times you will lose your sparks, grow in different ways, and change life paths but knowing what it feels like to have a spark gives you a feeling to always come back to. A feeling you’ll want to hold as your standard moving forward because you know how blissful your life can be.

Never stop seeking sparks, never compromise your passions, and always believe you are worthy of magic.

Cheers loves,

XO – Autumn

 

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Honesty, Writing, & Bright Futures.

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Fanueil Hall, Boston 2016

As a national contributing writer for Her Campus, I’ve had a lot of opportunities to write about various topics, trends in pop culture, and serious issues. This range of article assignments opened my eyes to different styles of writing but also helped me to recognize a common theme – the importance of honesty.

Honest writing is truly the best writing. It has taken me years to fully embrace this concept, as it’s scary to dig deep sometimes, but wow, was it worth it. Genuine writing derives from the ability to be honest with yourself. Whether it’s grappling with who you are or what you want out of life, the most important thing is to give yourself the opportunity to change.

My most recent article for Her Campus, titled “I Took Risks in My Love Life for One Week & Here’s What Happened”, was the most challenging yet rewarding piece I have written yet. I pushed the boundaries of my comfort zone, officially told the world I’m bisexual, and learned a lot about my self-worth in just one short week. An added bonus was the feedback I received from loved ones and strangers alike. It was heart-warming to have so many people reach out to me to share their stories or appreciation about my article.

I have now begun living my life as my authentic self. It’s a beautiful reality to wake up every single day and recognize how far I’ve come. This feeling came from being honest with myself, no matter how difficult and frustrating it was at times. Point is, I’m here and I’m so proud to say my future is even brighter than it was before.

Whether it’s in your writing or everyday life, be sure to stay true to who you are and be honest about what you deserve. It doesn’t have to be scary.

Cheers loves – to honesty & genuine people!

XOXO – Autumn

Below is a short clip from my national article, check it out!

“I bought an attractive stranger a drink.”

“I’ve seen this done in movies. The confident woman buys an attractive guy a drink, turning the tables on the standards of dating. I had to see for myself how this scenario would play out in real life. Naturally, I chose Thirsty Thursday to make my move. Sitting at a table with a few of my girlfriends, I scanned the bar for a potential prospect. This part of my night was funny, somewhat stressful, but overall entertaining knowing the power was in my hands.

As I was scanning the nearby tables, a tall blonde guy walked out of the bathroom and past my table. We locked eyes and he smiled ever so subtly. Without hesitation, I whispered to my friends, “I choose him.” I watched where he went to sit – a table with another guy and three girls. Crossing my fingers none of those ladies were his girlfriend, I asked my server to find out what he was drinking and buy him his next round. Apparently, his drink of choice was a watermelon margarita, go figure.

Margarita in hand, I watched my server walk over to his table and place it down. His friends began to laugh and his face lit up when she said, “the girl in a pink sweater bought this for you.” His reaction was everything I could have hoped for. I mean who wouldn’t be grinning over a free marg? Funnily enough, a server came over to me a few minutes later and handed me a black business card. It belonged to watermelon margarita guy. I was caught off guard but loving every second of this little charade. Soon enough he came over to the table to thank me for buying him a drink and introduce himself. The conversation was casual, I could tell he was nervous too. In his very distinct Boston accent, he ended the conversation by telling me I should text him. Mission accomplished.

I miss hearing stories about people meeting in person and going on incredible dates. And here I was, trying to make it happen for myself. No, I never ended up texting him, but his little black business card will be a reminder that even the smallest rewards can come from simply putting yourself out there.”

  • Article was written for Her Campus By: Autumn Dube

“I’m busy.”

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Rose Garden, Boston

Busy. Everyone wants to be seen as busy. Our culture promotes the idea that a busy lifestyle means you’re worth something. It means you’re actually doing something, contributing to society in some way. Whether it’s taking crazy course loads or working overtime at your job, being busy means you’re being productive. In other words, you’re not just sitting around.

It makes us feel good to utter the words, “I’m so busy,” does it not? We tend to compare our lives to others, seeing who’s schedule is more demanding, and subtly declaring a “winner” based upon that alone.

I have always supported this hectic lifestyle. Getting involved in as many things as possible, pushing my limits each day, and challenging myself to still be better than everyone else who are doing similar things. Yes, I’m a bit of a competitor. I love the rush that comes with being busy and feeling as though I’m in demand. But at what cost?

I’m a senior this year (yayy!). I’m involved in just as many things as I have been these past years but for some reason I don’t feel as stressed. I actually have some solid free time! I know, crazy right? Funny thing is, I’m not sure what to do with myself. Is it okay to simply kick back and relax? Shouldn’t I be looking for something to do or getting ahead on homework? I was creating stress from my thoughts of what I could be doing, not even what I had to do.

I’ve made the decision to cave. To appreciate my free time and be okay with doing nothing. Eat Pray Love, one of my favorite books, holds a memorable and applicable quote, “The sweetness of doing nothing,” as they say in Italy.

It’s a refreshing thought. How doing nothing can be absolutely beautiful. This isn’t to say you shouldn’t make something of yourself, probably because I disagree with a lazy lifestyle. But why does relaxing have to be seen as a bad thing? Why can’t we enjoy the moments we get to take a breather, and better yet enjoy them with people we love.

I know I’m excited to embrace this new mindset as I take on my last year of college. It doesn’t feel natural, at least not yet, but I want it to. So here’s to coffee dates, pointless walks in the city, and afternoons reading books for pleasure.

If you really think about it, we’d all be a bit happier if we took this time for ourselves. We may feel obligated to constantly stay busy but maybe it doesn’t always have to be that way.

XOXO – Autumn